Mom on Facebook

By Molly Hanlon

EASTON-Nineteen year old college student Nora Feeney would kick parents off Facebook if she had the power.

“There should be a separate website for parents,” Feeney said.

Feeney said her mother does not have a Facebook, but if she did she would block her. She said she would ignore her mother’s ‘friend’ request on Facebook, especially now while she is in college.

“My mom sees one side of me, and my friends see another, and my Facebook shows that other side. Parents can see all your pictures, your friend’s pictures, and your statuses,” Feeney said.

Feeney is one of many of teenagers and young adults on Facebook now facing an increasing number of parents and older adults joining the social media site.

A PEW research study done by Mary Madden, a senior research specialist at PEW Research Center, says that the social networking use among internet users ages 50 and older has nearly doubled, from 22 percent to 42 percent over the past year.

“Young adults continue to be the heaviest users of social media, yet their growth pales in comparison with recent gains made by older users,” Mary Madden said in a press conference release.

Lauren Miller, 20, said the interaction of parents and their children should not carry over Facebook.

“I don’t like it when my friend’s parents who have a Facebook try to act like our peers and comment on everything, especially comments like ‘watch your language young lady!’” Miller said.

Miller, a student at St. Anslem College, said her mother has a Facebook but she does not mind as much because she does not spend as much time on the site.

“My mom is on my ‘Limited Profile’ list to prevent her excessive involvement in my social life. I don’t want to feel like my every move or comment is being judged,” Miller said.

Miller’s mother, Dianna Welch, 46, works for a leading provider of maintenance service programs for computer hardware and has four children.

“I originally crafted a Facebook to get in touch with old classmates and I also use it because we actually have a social network via SMS (work) where we use Facebook to share funny anecdotes,” Welch said.

Welch said she does not use Facebook to “check up” on her kids.

“I do not think Facebook is an effective tool for keeping ‘tabs’ on your children, but most children act pretty foolishly with respect to regarding their privacy. I cringe at some of the verbal statements and videos I have seen with my own kids,” Welch said.

She said parents who are “friends” with their children on Facebook need to demonstrate trust and respect. Parents who “stalk” their children’s Facebook page may create potential problems in their relationships, she said.

There are still many older adults that are against using Facebook, whether it is used for checking up on your kids or getting in touch with old friends or any other reason.

The PEW researcher, Mary Madden said in a press conference release that email is still the primary way of communication between older adults.

Donna Ferrara, 35, a resident of Winthrop, Mass., said she believes in good old fashioned communication.

“I am not on Facebook because for one, I don’t have the time and second, I am a private person and don’t feel the need for all of my information, pictures, status, and whereabouts to be posted for my friends and family to see,” Ferrara said.

“I definitely do not think that Facebook is an effective method for checking on your kids,” Ferrara, a mother of one said.

She said she believes that using a cell phone to communicate with your kids and knowing where they are at all times if they are under 18 is an effective way of keeping “tabs” on them.

Marcia Wallace, 33, a mother of two from Plymouth, Mass., and lover of personal handwritten communication agrees.

“I don’t really subscribe to the idea of ‘hey everybody…check me out!’. It comes across as arrogant to me in some ways,” Wallace said.

Wallace, an English teacher, said she would not like her two young daughters to have a Facebook, but if she thought it appropriate, they would be strictly monitored by herself and her husband.

“I understand that in this day and age it is easier to communicate this way, it’s just not how I want to. I prefer a much more personal way of communicating, over the phone, face to face, handwritten letters, etc,” Wallace said.